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Posts Tagged ‘transgender books’

Note: Part of the following piece (previously published on The Huffington Post) is aired this week on the international radio syndicate This Way Out.  To hear the entire podcast on the This Way Out website, click below.

Gender has always been on my mind — or in my face — whether I like it or not. As a budding feminist and then a young lesbian with short hair, I was called “Sir” on more than one occasion. I didn’t like it, but was happy to have the privileges that being perceived as male brought. I am over six feet tall and trained as a martial artist. Usually, no one bothers me on the street. In my forties, I grew my hair long and went through a femme phase. In the past few years, I lost weight and cut my hair short again. Again, I hear someone say “excuse me sir” and turn around to find the comment is directed at me.

But this time I am over fifty, and I really don’t care what other people think. Recently, I found myself back in a college classroom and since it was a course on anthropology, I decided to use my powers of observation. Of the twelve or so students, I counted nine different genders. This wasn’t a queer studies class — and no one was openly transgendered. But almost everyone, including myself, was on a different point of the gender spectrum.

Feminism helped to open up gender roles. We redefined what it meant to be female. Feminism converged with gay liberation. Men could be different, too. We redefined who could be male or female and what that meant. When I read The New York Times article about the group of five ten to eleven year old girls who want to join the Boy Scouts, I thought “Good for them.” They are my heroes. We’ve come a long way. It’s okay to be the gender that you are. It’s okay to cross the gender line to become the gender that you already are inside. And it’s okay to express your gender the way you want to.

Recently, I came across three excellent photography books from Daylight Books that address various forms of gender expression. In Every Breath We Drew, queer photographer Jess T. Dugan doesn’t put her subjects in a category. Rather, the subjects are united, in her words, “by my attraction to them — and not a romantic attraction, particularly, but a more complicated attraction of recognizing something in them I also perceive or desire in myself.”

The result is an intriguing collection of stellar color photographs — inclusive of soft butch lesbians, straight men, trans men and gay men. In “Devotions” a naked woman kneels on the bed tying the boot of a person who is off camera. The peak of her short hair comes to the front of her head and she leans over the boot and ties the lace as if she is praying. In my mind, the boot is on the foot of her lesbian lover. But the beauty of the photograph — one of them — is that be interpreted by the viewer.

Gays In The Military Photographs and Interviews by Vincent Cianni (also published by Daylight Books) is a starker collection of black and white photographs, which is more suitable than color to life lived in the shadows until the relatively recent repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. The first photo shows a person in camouflage uniform (I assume he’s male –given the shaved head and the hat) looking away from the camera toward the tree and horizon line of the hill behind him. It’s a good photograph and an apt metaphor given that gays and lesbians in the military had to live clandestine lives. In the rest of the photos in this collection, the people show their faces. There’s a haunted quality to many, if not most, of the photographs.

Decades ago, I knew a few lesbians who had been in the military and none talked about violence or war or killing as a reason they enlisted. This sentiment was echoed in an interview with a lesbian who said:

“The people who join the military go into the military not because they want to make war. Most of them go to keep the peace…. It is a shame that you have a perfectly willing gay man or woman very qualified, well educated, well behaved and they can’t serve, while the military is cutting their standards in order to fill the ranks. It’s not justice for us and it’s not justice for the military.”

TransCuba (also from Daylight Books) is a beautiful book of color photographs by Mariette Pathy Allen. In reading the introduction by the photographer, I gained new insight into the life of sexual minorities in Cuba:

“I see transgender Cubans as a metaphor for Cuba itself: people living between genders in a country moving between doctrines. As restrictions decrease, discrimination against people who are gender nonconformists is becoming less prevalent. A lot of credit for making their lives easier belongs to Raul Castro’s daughter, Mariela…”

There are many beautiful images in the book. One in particular seemed to say it all. A trans woman is sitting her bed holding her one week old piglet, feeding the newborn with a bottle. The composition is perfect. Charito’s brown shorts match the headboard of the bed and the side table. The wall behind is the pale aqua that is so prevalent in Cuba and a single chiffon scarf hanging from the wall has pink flowers on it that match the pink of the newborn pig. And the pig is loving Charito, not judging her.
The trans women represented in this book are bravely living their lives — and creating a more open world (without rigid gender roles) that we all can live in — including heterosexuals.

That’s why it is called liberation.

 

To listen to the entire podcast, click here.

 

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by Janet Mason — first published in The Huffington Post

Rigid gender roles are irritating to many of us, damaging to society at large (whether people know it or not), and absolutely toxic to gender nonconforming children and their families. But like it or not, there are “boy’s toys” and “girl’s toys” and they are marketed aggressively.

As a second-generation feminist and a lesbian feminist who has spent many years confronting gender stereotypes, some decades ago I had reservations about transgender issues. My thinking was that we should feel free to pursue our interests, regardless of gender. I still think that. But as the transgender liberation movement grew, so did my awareness. I met a few people. I read a few books. But ultimately it was a seven year old child who opened my heart and changed my mind completely. This child was born as a boy and identified as a girl. She was fortunate to have loving and accepting parents. As I listened to this extremely articulate child talking on the radio, I identified with her. She was saying that she had a few friends that she told, but that she had to be careful about telling most people. At the time, I was working for a large organization and I was treading a fine line about who I came out to since some of my co-workers could handle it and some clearly could not. As in denial as I was about my work situation, a very clear voice in my mind said that this seven year old should not have to live her life in the same way that I did.

It was my privilege to read three new books that were recently published on transgender issues and the story of a gender nonconforming child. Raising My Rainbow, adventures in raising a fabulous, gender creative son by Lori Duron (2013, Broadway Books) is a funny yet serious first person story of a mom doing her best in the raising of her gender creative son, who insists on wearing a tutu to dance class and has to be talked out of knotting his soccer shirt at his hip. Lori is already ahead of the game. Her brother is gay, and she has long been a member of PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) which she describes “as the most supportive support group that I’ve ever seen; it’s good for the soul; it’s what church should feel like.”

Duron covers important family issues that a family raising a gender creative child, including parenting his gender conforming older brother and confronting bullying issues that he faces as a result of his younger sibling. Ultimately, she and her husband work with her children’s school, the ACLU and her younger son’s therapist ( who warns the parents that parents that transgender children have the highest rate of suicide) to resolve the issue. The book has helpful sections in the back, including a listing of resources and a section titled “Twelve Things Every Gender Nonconforming Child Wants You to Know.” Item number two: “If you are confused and can’t quite tell if I’m a boy or a girl, just know that I am a person. Please treat me that way.”

On the other side of the equation is Stuck In The Middle With You, A Memoir of Parenting in Three Genders by Jennifer Finney Boylan (2013; Crown). Boylan writes about her journey of fathering two sons with her wife, transitioning, and being a mother to her children. Particularly poignant is Boylan’s struggle with her gender identity, her decision to tell her wife, and the couples’ decision to stay together through and after her transition. Stuck In The Middle With You is also a writer’s memoir that includes interviews, on identity, parents and parenting, with many authors including Augusten Burroughs, Edward Albee and Ann Beattie.

“Most of the time I just have to resign myself to the fact that this whole business is beyond comprehension for most straight people. If you’re not trans, you’re free from thinking about what gender you are in the same way that white people in America are generally free from having to think about what race they are,” writes Boylan.

 
 

In Trans Bodies, Trans Selves, A Resource For The Transgender Community, Boylan quotes her mother in the introduction, It is impossible to hate anyone whose story you know.” Trans Bodies, Trans Selves (2014; Oxford University Press) is a great resource book (a whopping 648 pages) full of important information and lots of stories. Sections include Sex and Gender (with a simple line drawing indicating that gender identity is located in the mind, sexual orientation in the heart, and sex is in the genitals. The issues are more complex — but the drawing is spot on.

Other sections include “Race, Ethnicity, and Culture;” “Disabilities and Deaf Culture; “Religion and Spirituality;” “Legal Issues;” “General, Sexual, and Reproductive Health;” “Medical Transition;” “Mental Health Services and Support;” “Intimate Relationships;” “Sexuality;” “Parenting;” “Youth;” “Aging;” “Arts and Culture;” just to name a few. The volume ends with an Afterword from the founders of the Boston Women’s Health Collective, authors of Our Bodies, Our Selves. I expect that Trans Bodies, Trans Selves will become a staple in the trans community, including non-trans family members and loved ones — and, like Our Bodies, Our Selves, will become such an integral, helpful resource that we cannot imagine living without it.

from The Huffington Post

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